Happy F’ng New Year

By @danVFL_ , 12/27/16

This is the legendary tale of Sabanocchio completely whiffing on Cam Akers. Let’s jump right into it. We pick up this story on Christmas Day 2016, where we find Sab in the Christmas spirit:

Unfortunately, the holidays are getting Sab in maybe too good a mood. Already off to a bad start tweeting at recruits, literally the first rule of Twitter.

Merry Christmas to you as well Sab! It is absolutely a privilege to follow you (I don’t).

Covering Your Bases Part 1

Wow, this guy must really be in the know.

Still in the holiday spirit!

Things are looking good for us. But yeah, I kinda wish you had more than one source…

Agree, you HAVE to roll with a source that good.

Covering Your Bases Part 2

Yeah seriously, 247 can you please do your job???

Ehhhhh

Oh??

Who is it Sab??????

Oh it’s you!! You sly dog. Finally, a second source. That pretty much seals it.

*Eye roll emoji*

Hell yeah, I can see Akers doing a 3-yd dive on 3rd and 12 now.

Nope. Not. A. Chance.

Oh baby we’re rolling now. THREE sources.

(Bonus tweet on Yusuf Corker)

(Oh, okay.)

Yeah, me neither.

Agree there, can’t get this information anywhere else. It’s a privilege to follow Sab.

Wow, I didn’t find one either!!!

You won’t get this kind of information anywhere else. Except from 247.

More INSIDE INFO from Sab. You. Won’t. Get. This. Anywhere. Else.

That’s pretty high!! Must be confident. I would be if I had such good sources.

Agree. Tired of having to lean on our Fiesta Bowl win.

Yeah you IDIOTS, this is the number one rule of journalism.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Uh oh, one of Sab’s sources is leaving!! Where will he get is info now?????

But I thought you already knew…?

Look at that! Sab’s got jokes.

Confidence is still there on signing day, that’s a good sign.

Uh oh.

Covering Your Bases Part 3

What. A. Turn. Of. Events.

WHAT. A. TURN. OF. EVENTS.

Covering Your Bases Part 4

Dude, you literally said that you loved knowing things before they happen. Just scroll back up.

Riiiiiight.

Welp.

Covering Your Bases Part 5

There’s still hope!! Sab is going to die on this hill!!!

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Cam chose Florida State.

The end, hope you enjoyed.